Categories
Europe Food + Drinks Solo Travel

WHAT TO EAT AND DRINK IN ISTANBUL

The short answer? Everything.

The downside to taking a last-minute weekend trip once I’d already splurged on a huge twelve-day trip in the same month, was that unfortunately I couldn’t afford to eat everything. Nor did I have the time. And since my hotel offered free breakfast and afternoon snacks, I didn’t wander far from the Sultanahmet area during dinner time. While there were no McDonald’s or TGIFridays, I was told that area is nothing more than a tourist trap with overpriced and under-flavored food.

All I can say is that if that’s true, then my taste buds must be seriously jacked because I developed a borderline addiction to every single thing I put into my mouth.

Sultanahmet was full of pushy hosts standing in front of every restaurant, fighting for the attention to lure in every passerby. It’s actually incredibly annoying. It took me about 30 minutes, but I finally decided on a restaurant called Masal because the guy at the door didn’t seem like a truck-stop rapist or a desperate prom date. Reverse psychology I suppose.

Thus began my extraordinary culinary tour of Istanbul. And while I’m not exactly a foodie, I do have over 28 years of experience in eating so that gives me some sort of credibility, right?

Here are seven budget-friendly foods or drinks that are definitely worth trying in Istanbul.

Lahmacun

Lahmacun

LAHMACUN

The first dish I tried was lahmacun, a simple pizza-like flatbread that I could’ve sworn I’d remembered Anthony Bourdain refer to as mandatory drunk food. Even though I wasn’t drunk, I knew my Taco Bell loving tummy (having been trained by years of eating—and enjoying—borderline offensive food) would love it.

The large piece of dough is topped with minced meat (beef and lamb), minced vegetables, and herbs, and then baked. It was delivered to my table with a side of lemons and a plate of vegetables including cabbage, pickles, tomatoes, onions, lettuce, and parsley. I think you’re supposed to pile on the salad, squeeze on the lemon juice, roll it up and eat it, but I chose to do it in smaller pieces because 1) it would’ve been huge, and 2) I hate the whole “now that I’ve rolled it I can’t set it down” thing. Either way, that stuff was fantastic and not nearly as filling as I thought it’d be. I could’ve easily eaten two more. And it was nowhere near as greasy or degrading as drunk food in the US.

But whatever you do, DO NOT skimp on the lemon juice. It’s key.

Turkish Bagel and tea

SIMIT (TURKISH BAGELS)

Alright, alright. I’ve lived in New York for nearly eight years, so I’ve been pretty spoiled by the very definition of a bagel. I was skeptical when my new hotel friends invited me for Turkish bagels and tea. A simit is essentially a sesame seed hybrid between a bagel and a pretzel that’s crispy and crusty on the outside, but fluffy on the inside. Splice it open and layer it with some tomatoes and cheese, and serve with a side of hot tea with a view of the Blue Mosque, and you’ve got yourself the perfect afternoon snack.

Dinner doner kebab

İSKENDER KEBAP & BALLOON BREAD

One night I decided to treat myself to a nice meal (and a lot of red wine), so I popped into Sura Kebab House and ordered my very first İskender kebap. Holy satisfying dinner. I never knew meat and yogurt could go together so well.

They served me a gigantic loaf of this balloon bread, which was easily the size of a brown paper shopping bag, along with a small dish of what I’m pretty sure was salted butter and a soft cheese—maybe goat cheese? I don’t know if I was supposed to mix the two together and spread on the bread, but I did and the results were absolutely phenomenal. Groups of tourists glanced at me while I devoured the bread and gulped down my Pinot Noir. Then the kebab came out, drenched in a tomato-based sauce and served next to a bed of yogurt.

As the weird girl who won’t hesitate to dine solo, I made friends with the entire waitstaff that night and got free shots of Raki when I was finished. Though it is the national drink of Turkey, Raki was nothing special in my opinion and very similar to ouzo or sambuca. Barf, pass.

unnamed-3

TURKISH TEA

Okay this isn’t really fair because I LOVE TEA. Black, green, herbal, chai, morning, noon, and night, you name it. All kinds of tea, doesn’t matter, I will drink every last sip. So when the waiter handed me this perfect, and better yet free glass of apple tea, I didn’t think it was possible to have a better meal ending . That is, until I walked down the street and picked up some…

unnamed-4

BAKLAVA

One cannot go to Turkey without indulging on the delicious sweets that have become so popular here in the Western world. While they say baklava’s origins aren’t particularly well documented, some suggest that the modern day form was created right inside Topkapi Palace in Istanbul.

Wherever the hell it’s from, baklava is abundant in Istanbul. I stopped by several shops and easily consumed 1500 calories in sweet, sticky deliciousness before returning to my hotel every single night.

Kofte

TARIHI SULTANAHMET KÖFTECISI

Okay so this is the name of a restaurant, but they only serve a couple of things on the menu—the main item being köfte, or Turkish meatballs. The place itself is definitely a no-frills restaurant, but their meatballs are supposedly some of the best in the area. One of my new friends I’d partied with in Taksim took me here for lunch, claiming it to be a favorite amongst the locals. Unfortunately after our super late night out, I was still a wee bit too hungover to handle much solid food. The meat was definitely delicious and juicy, but I could only eat about three and a half before retreating back to my hotel room to crawl under the sheets and swear off drinking (again).

I also washed my meal down with an Ayran, which is a cold yogurt drink mixed with salt, and a national non-alcoholic drink in Turkey. Everyone in the place was sucking these down, and again the whole meat + yogurt thing is genius.

Salep

Salep

SALEP

The evenings were still chilly, so I bought a cup of sahlep to keep warm, thinking it’d be like a spicy hot chocolate. Not exactly. Salep is a flour made from some kind of orchid, but it’s commonly used in a hot wintertime drink. This drink in particular was made with milk, honey, orchid bud, vanilla, cream, cinnamon, and spices. It had a much thicker consistency than hot chocolate, almost like a glue that was so thick the piles of cinnamon clumped together on top because it was too thick to permeate. Regardless, I drank the entire cup before it got cold, and once I got past the weird texture I loved every second of it.

Turkish food has quickly moved to the top of my favorite cuisines. Istanbul is the kind of place where you will not go hungry. I only [accidentally] ended up eating chicken orzo at one super touristy place. The rest of the time I was sampling bits and pieces of Turkish and Ottoman cuisine whenever and wherever possible. But I still barely scratched the surface in trying all of the foods on my must-eat list. Next winter when flights are back down below $500RT I’ll almost certainly head back over there and explore the lesser touristy neighborhoods for a few dinners. Totally worth it.

Have you ever been to Turkey? What’s your favorite Turkish food?

Categories
Europe Food + Drinks Travel

MY BIG FAT GREEK VACATION

Move over Mexican food. There’s a new first place contender for my gluttonous fat girl heart.

With its economy deep, deep in the shitter, I wasn’t really sure what to expect while I was in Greece. So I split my time between the ruins of Athens and the relaxing beaches of Crete. Both provided two starkly different views of Greece, but they also had two fantastic things in common: amazing hospitality and even better food. Seriously, not only was every single thing I put in my mouth worthy of a full-on addiction, the people putting these things on my plate wanted nothing more than to make sure I tasted everything, loved it, and ate some more.

I arrived in Athens right after an underwhelming couple of days in Italy. Maybe I went to the wrong places, but Rome just felt too busy, dirty, and touristy for me (though to be fair, the ruins around the Colosseum were beyond awesome). And frankly, I’d had similarly equal (if not better) Italian food in Little Italy. So on the drive from the airport to the hotel I was worried that the run-down streets of Athens would leave me feeling the same way. It felt old, dirty, and every surface was newly adorned with layers of graffiti. For a minute I thought about turning back to the airport to skip Athens all together and head to the islands.

Then we got to our hotel, the Herodion, and suddenly all was right in the world.

Considering the pocket change we paid, the hotel made me feel like a baller. Located at the base of the ultra-touristy Acropolis, it was just outside of the seemingly cash-strapped city streets and just a few blocks from the restaurants and shops of the Pláka. Aside from it being cheap enough for my travel partner Marcus and I to each have our own room, there was a rooftop garden just waiting for us to sip cocktails in the jacuzzi while looking out at the Parthenon. But I must say, once we finally made it up there I cracked open a Mythos and it kind of sucked. Reminded me a bit of Busch Light. Stick to food, Greece.

Our first evening in Athens we walked uphill to the Parthenon. It was closed for the evening, so naturally we went for the next best thing: food. Along some winding road down the hill we stopped into a restaurant that we couldn’t even read the name of,  and the food absolutely blew my mind. It was my first taste of Greek food, and I only wish I would’ve been more hungry. But like a true fatty I went straight for the cheese appetizers. Two of them to be exact. Pan fried kefalotyri cheese for €4,50 and feta saganaki drizzled with honey for €6. Holy mind-blowing shit it was delicious.

The next morning I was introduced to my first of many deliciously satisfying all-you-can-eat breakfast buffets in Greece. I ate about six plates, which held me over until dinner when we stopped at Plakiotissa. Marcus ordered the always delicious moussaka, and I got stuffed peppers. It’s weird that this place has such bad reviews on TripAdvisor, because we both thought it was pretty damn tasty. Not as amazing as the first place we went, but still a solid, satisfying meal. We both scarfed down our meals until we were uncomfortably full, and when we thought we could eat no more, our new waiter friend brought us out free dessert. If this was a typical tourist-friendly Greek restaurant, I can’t even imagine how good the local spots were.

Ten extra pounds of Kim proved that I fell in love with food all over again in Athens. But it got even better.

I stayed at two different hotels in Crete, the first had buffet meals that were easy enough to sneak into without paying (woops). So of course I did that and sampled everything I could get my hands on. I know, how often do you get amazing food at a buffet though, right? Apparently all the time in Greece.



The salads. The stuffed grape leaves. The flaky phyllo layered with spinach and feta. The better-than-Italian pasta. The galaktoboureko. The lamb. The galatopita. I don’t even know what I was piling on my plate most of the time, but I do know that I never tried a single thing in Greece that I didn’t like. I went to several restaurants in Crete and ordered main dishes of things I’d sampled at the buffet, only to be even more wowed, but I know I’ve only barely scraped the surface of awesome Greek food.

It took all of my power not to throw out all of my clothes and fill my luggage with olive oil, spices, cheese, and whatever else I could fit in there from the airport marketplace. But I figured a cookbook would last much longer than any sort of actual food that’d surely be gone before my plane even made it back to the States, so I picked one up and decided I could make some of this stuff back in New York.

Have I yet? No. From what I can tell, cooking Greek food is super intimidating. But I’m up for the challenge if anyone wants to come over for dinner! I sure as hell can’t cook all that food just for one person.

Moral of the story, Greece has some incredible food. So when life gives a beautiful country financial lemons, travel there and make lemonade in the form of delicious meals and cheap accommodations. Just make sure to keep some cardio in your plan.

Categories
Europe Food + Drinks Ireland

What Not to do in Dublin

I fell in love with Ireland the second I stepped off the plane, though I wasn’t exactly sure why. Especially since the only day I spent in Dublin was anything but ideal. I was only there for the weekend though, so I spent Saturday in the city before heading off on a fourteen hour tour of Northern Ireland on Sunday. But more on that later.

Basically, my perfect day in Dublin was supposed to go a little something like this:

– Wake up early.

– Have an Irish breakfast, including Guinness.

– Walk around town taking awesome photos.

– Tour the old Jameson Distillery. Drink Jameson.

– Take a leisurely stroll through the Guinness Storehouse.

– Drink Guinness at Gravity bar, admiring the views over Dublin.

– Find a bar to watch Ireland v France rugby while eating Irish stew and drinking more Guinness.

– Meet fun locals at said bar and continue on the evening with a pub crawl.

Sounds like the perfect Saturday in Dublin, right? Ideally, yes. But instead it went a little something like this:

– Woke up two hours later than I’d hoped.

– Inhaled a cup of rice pudding I’d mistaken for Greek yogurt in an attempt to save time on eating breakfast.

– Made it a few blocks snapping photos against a miserable looking sky, before the incessant mist became a bit too much for my camera.

 

Christ Church Cathedral

Kim

– Stumbled upon the Old Jameson Distillery only to see the next 93 minutes of tours sold out. Luckily I was able to sign up for the last one of the day at 515pm, but since it was already 2 I had to hoof it over to the Guinness Storehouse to make it back in time.

– Took the long back-way over to Guinness in what had now become a steady rain and light wind. You know, just to ensure I was properly soaked before going inside.

Screen shot 2013-03-11 at 10.46.33 PM

Screen shot 2013-03-11 at 10.43.07 PM

Screen shot 2013-03-11 at 10.41.04 PM

– Had no time to stop for lunch, so I chugged my sample beer, poured my perfect pint, then chugged that too. And just like that with no food in my stomach, I was tipsy.

Pouring the pint

Screen shot 2013-03-11 at 10.43.39 PM

Screen shot 2013-03-11 at 10.42.09 PM

Screen shot 2013-03-11 at 10.42.32 PM

– Visited Gravity Bar long enough to snap a few photos of raindrops and clouds before rushing out the door to the Old Jameson Distillery.

Screen shot 2013-03-11 at 10.44.07 PM

– Bought a Guinness coffee mug on the way out, then oh-so-cleverly carried it unguarded in the rain in a paper bag with a thick rope handle.

– Got disoriented on my way back towards the Old Jameson Distillery and ended up walking about five blocks too far. So I asked some nice Irish fella to point me in the right direction and found myself backtracking with only six minutes until the tour started. Then, right there on the corner of Mary’s Lane and Greek Street, tragedy struck. The Guinness bag succumbed to the battle against the rain, and the bottom fell out, sending my prized mug crashing to the ground. I shouted expletives as a family across the street pulled their daughter near to avoid my harsh words. But come on, she’s Irish, surely she’s heard worse? I picked up the pieces and carried the shattered, dripping wet remains into the Jameson Distillery just in time at 514PM.

– Did the Jameson tour, grabbed the largest glass of free whiskey afterwards and downed it a bit too quickly in an attempt to make it to watch rugby.

Screen shot 2013-03-11 at 10.38.29 PM

Screen shot 2013-03-11 at 10.38.59 PM

Jameson Barrel

– Walked another 20 minutes in the rain and wind before realizing I’d completely missed the rugby match.

– Stopped into a pub for an Irish stew only to discover that they didn’t accept swipe cards.

– Pissed off, I went out the door and directly across the street to McDonald’s. I was still buzzed and by this point STARVING, so I ordered 12 chicken McNuggets, a large fry, an apple pie, cheese sticks, and a chocolate shake. And I took it all back to the apartment and ate every. Last. Crumb.

 

It wasn’t necessarily a bad day, but I did miss out on a few key things due to poor planning and unexpectedly quick intoxication. So folks, if you’re going to Dublin, here are a few pointers:

– Remember that Guinness should not be a substitute for food. You will get drunk.

– Take an umbrella and a sturdy bag if you plan on buying any fragile souvenirs. Sadly the gift shop attendant at the Jameson Distillery said that happens all the time.

– Buy your tickets to the Guinness Storehouse and Old Jameson Distillery in advance online. You’ll save a few bucks, plan your day a little better, and avoid the lines.

– If you’re deciding between touring Guinness or Jameson, I think the Guinness Storehouse is the better choice. The Jameson Distillery was great, as was the tour guide, but it was shorter and felt like more of a theatrical setup since it’s in a place they no longer use, whereas the Guinness Storehouse felt like a much bigger experience.

– Don’t count on going out to a pub near the Old Jameson Distillery. There aren’t any.

– Have fun. Drink Irish beer and whiskey. Eat Irish food. And chat with the locals. From my experience they’re super friendly (at least if you’re American) and LOVE to talk. Plus they have cool accents!

 

 

 

Categories
Europe Food + Drinks Living Abroad

Lazy Sunday at the Camden Market

This past weekend finally brought blue skies and well above freezing temperatures to London, so I spent Sunday roaming around Camden Market with my friend Julie whom I met a few years ago in New York. She’s originally from France but currently living in Geneva, and luckily for me visiting London with her equally awesome friend for a few days.

Pub shot
My selfies are out of focus about 70% of the time

 

Camden Market has been on my list of places to see since I’ve arrived, though I wasn’t exactly sure why since I’m not usually one to gravitate towards overcrowded shopping areas. But alas I went, and I was pleasantly surprised that it was far more entertaining than I’d expected.

The thing about Camden Market is that it’s so incredibly massive—it’s made up of six main sections, and then some—everyone’s bound to have a different experience. So let me give you a small sampling of what I encountered while strolling through for a few hours.

Music shop

 

When we first started walking through the scattering of souvenir shops, shoe stores, and KFC’s, I wasn’t impressed. The overcrowded streets reminded me of East Harlem during a summer street fair, minus the sweaty heat. Then we went into the green Camden Market tent which was completely packed with countless, nearly identical clothing shops. Each booth owner tried to get our money—the women by pushing the latest fashions and “just for you” discount prices in our faces, and the guys by flirtatiously combatting our “we’re just looking” lines with “…looking for a boyfriend?”

Screen shot 2013-03-03 at 9.35.52 PM

Gothic clothes and KFC
Gothic clothes and fried chicken

 

I was hooked as soon as we made our way towards the food in Camden Lock. The surprisingly harmonious scents of Indian, Thai, Chinese, and Mexican spices lured me in, and had I not been concerned about certain digestive repercussions I would’ve sampled something from each stand. But alas I found myself drooling over the sizzling fajitas that the two semi-Mexican looking men were serving up. I ordered carne asada tacos, which were… well, interesting. The corn tacos were stuffed with a mixture of what looked like canned chili, peas, corn, tomatoes, cheese, avocado salsa, and sour cream, on top of a bed of iceberg lettuce and deglo orange rice. Pretending for a moment that it wasn’t Mexican food, I suppose it wasn’t all that bad. In fact I’ll even bet that it would’ve been incredible after about ten beers. But I’ll never go back.

"Mexican food" at Camden Market
“Mexican food” at Camden Market

 

In my search for bottled water I was drawn to some no-name stand where I heard Tool’s Ænima album blasting. The dread-locked, tattooed, gauged ear guy running the stand (hello 18-year old Kim’s dream guy) was putting so much passion into making his coffee to the beat of Eulogy that I felt compelled to order a caffe mocha. And thankfully so. It was warm, thick, foamy, and overall a delicious companion for the chilly afternoon, even though it was gone in about six sips.

Caffe Mocha Art

 

We finally made our way into the Stables Market and down to the pinnacle of my Sunday market adventure, Cyberdog. This place was like a rave, complete with pumping music, dancing girls in short shorts, wildly outrageous but equally incredible futuristic outfits, and I wouldn’t be surprised if there were even some drugs scattered about. They carried all sorts of wacky unique gag gifts and party clothes, from guitar baking spatulas, to galactic dresses you’ve probably only seen on the Jetsons, to OhMiBod iPod-powered vibrators that sync up with your music to get you off to a beat. (Or to help you beat off? Get it??!) Yep.

Best store ever, forreal
Awesome. F’ing. Store.

Best store ever

Saturn
Awesome Saturn light!
Galactic Dresses
If they weren’t so expensive, I’d seriously consider rocking these galactic dresses.

 

After Cyberdog the rest of the shops just didn’t seem to compare, so what else could we do except stop for a cupcake? It was almost closing time and most of the flavors had been picked over at Mimi’s Cupcakes, but I managed to grab a winter fruit mini cupcake for just £1. The cake was much thicker than what I’m used to in the states, probably about the same consistency of cornbread, but it made this bite-sized treat perfectly fulfilling. The tart, fruity icing was like a thick buttercream, but it played a refreshing trick on my mind to make me think I was eating something lighter and more healthy.

Winter fruit cupcake at Mimi's Cupcakes
Winter fruit cupcake at Mimi’s Cupcakes

 

I think my favorite thing about Camden Market was the grunginess of it all. I feel more at home when I’m around people in hoodies with tattoos and piercings as opposed to those in collared shirts, sweaters, and perfectly pressed slacks like the other areas I’ve been to. And it wasn’t too in-your-face with people forcing us to buy stuff (except for the food market, but they were forcing us to taste their free samples so who can really complain?). Plus there truly seemed to be at least one shop for everyone there—even those of us who hate shopping. Definitely a good market worth getting lost in for a few hours, but you have to take the time to go deep inside to find where the shops really start to get good.

 

Categories
Europe Food + Drinks

Top Notch BBQ in Bristol: Meat & Bread

Fresh off the heels of a 48 hour gluttonfest in Bristol, I’m absolutely knackered (yes I’m incorporating British words into my vocabulary now). I don’t know if I did more eating or drinking, but I do recall a “UK vs US” contest in which we each drank for our country until the last man blacked out. Problem is when everyone is blacking out it’s hard to declare a “winner” for several reasons. I was told that I smuggled my last glass of whiskey from the bar, took a few sips while walking down the street, gave it a look of disgust and exclaimed “I’m done with this” as I threw it to shatter on the pavement. Real classy.

Backpedaling to Friday, after just a two hour bus ride from London we got into Bristol and immediately went out to a Mediterranean spot called Biblos which some of the guys swore was an absolute must-have. I ordered a falafel wrap with halloumi cheese, some spattering of sauces, and all of the toppings.

Not the easiest thing to eat.

This place had a super hipster vibe with benches and tables inviting you to cozy up next to those around you. So the three of us squeezed onto a bench opposite of a particularly filthy hipster that could have easily been mistaken for a homeless man. He was eating with a group of people who looked like they’d dressed themselves in the dark, complete with marker-drawn mustaches on the ladies. As I fumbled to keep my elbows in at my sides and out of my friends’ faces, I awkwardly shoved my face with each bite of dripping falafel like a dainty T-Rex. While it looked insanely appetizing, it was lacking a bit of flavor—which I’m noticing to hold true throughout most of England. I’m sure it has something to do with the amount of salt I’m used to in my fat American diet, but still. Not a terrible bite to eat, but I certainly wouldn’t go out of my way again.

The next day while watching rugby at The Three Tuns my friends kept talking about some epic BBQ food. I took their hype with a grain of salt considering their less than superior recommendation from the night before, so I nearly passed it up to go hunt down a burrito. Thankfully my laziness persuaded me to order a pulled pork and coleslaw sandwich.

Food Menu

Oh. My. God.

To say this was one of the best things I’ve ever put in my mouth would be an understatement. The sauce, the tender shreds of pork, the sauce, the perfectly toasted bun, the sauce, the fresh cole slaw, and the SAUCE. Generally I’m not even a fan of BBQ sauce but I’m assuming that’s because I’ve never had it done properly. This was homemade with a breakfast stout, and yes I would gladly pour this on my cereal every morning. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been craving flavor ever since I left the states or because it really was meat perfection, this was by far the first delicious bite of food that I’ve had in the UK. Paired with a dark stout, it was just fan-fucking-tastic.

Meat & Bread

The brilliant meat master who has everyone drooling over his meat is Ben Warran, owner of Meat & Bread. I’m told they smoke and cure their meats and make their own sauces and pickles to serve the lucky Bristolians who come across the food cart at lunchtime (or obsessively stalk their Twitter feed to find out where they’ll be next). But as of this Thursday, February 28th, they’ll be taking up a more permanent residence at The Three Tuns on St George’s Road, serving lunch and dinner Tues-Sat each week. Guess who’s planning another trip to Bristol in a few of weeks?

I’m telling you, if you like meat you need to get some Meat & Bread. And if you don’t like meat, well then we have much bigger problems to deal with and you should probably start solving those with a fat, juicy, meaty sandwich from Meat & Bread.

Categories
Food + Drinks Mexico Review

Authentic Mexican Food in Not-So Authentic Cabo San Lucas

I almost feel like a jerk for posting this because it’s going to be the most visually unappealing post I’ve ever shared. Not because the pics are particularly gross, but because 1- the blurry photos just don’t do the flavors justice, and 2- this weird thing happens when there’s food in front of me. I stop paying attention to my settings and just randomly snap pics because I’m in such a hurry to eat. So more often than not they come out blurry. But this experience was just so delicious, I couldn’t NOT share it despite the crappy pics.

If you love Mexican food like I do, there’s a good chance it won’t take too long until you find yourself feeling sad inside thanks to the local cuisine in the highly Americanized Cabo San Lucas. So instead of settling for tourist friendly beachside enchiladas drowning in sour cream, drive about ten blocks North of the tourist zone for a sit down meal at La Fonda. Holy mouthgasm. You won’t be sorry. And it’s cheap.

Up until this epic evening we’d eaten a lot of sub-par food in Cabo. The guacamoles were too creamy and bland, the entrees completely overpowered by seafood (which I guess could be a good thing if you like seafood tacos, I’m more of a beef and beans kinda gal), and generally lacking that authenticity that we were craving. Even at the highly recommended Villa Serena I wasn’t overly impressed for my birthday dinner (again, probably because I don’t love seafood dishes).

On our last night there I busted out the iPad, desperate to stumble upon some authentic hidden gem close by. That’s when I came across La Fonda on TripAdvisor, and after three seconds of looking at the menu decided we were going to eat like ravenous meat-deprived carnivores for the last supper.

And feast we did.

The restaurant was tucked away on Calle Miguel Hidalgo, and frankly a little hard to find (probably because we didn’t have a map). We drove around for a good 25 minutes before almost giving up. We were all hangry, and no matter which way we went we found ourselves back on Lázaro Cárdenas. Every wrong turn was one turn closer to defeat. Then out of nowhere we saw the tiny parking lot with friendly waiters standing there like they’d been waiting all night for us to arrive.

It was one of those restaurants where everything on the menu sounds delicious. The decor very traditional Mexican with bottles upon bottles of Tequila at the bar. The waitstaff was friendly, and almost more excited than we were for us to try their food. It felt like home. Or at least the Mexican version of home I’ve always felt I belonged in.

We ordered like we hadn’t eaten in weeks, getting appetizers and entrees to split amongst us all. Despite our oversized appetites, our bill only came out to $80 in the end. Money very well spent. I’d love to leave you with a website or something, but apparently they don’t have one. So if you don’t believe my taste buds, check out La Fonda on TripAdvisor.

I’ll leave you with some pretty shitty pictures that I really hope don’t deter you from giving this place a taste.

Disclaimer: A photo of the black bean empanadas are missing. They mysertiously disappeared before I could pull out my camera.

We were seated with a free sample, or rather, a tease. An excellent tease.
We were seated with a free sample, or rather, a tease. An excellent tease.
I love you even when you’re blurry, guacamole.
Queso fundido con chorizo. Nothing like a big dish of melted cheese and spicy meat.
Three quesadillas: pumpkin, shrimp, and huitlacoche (a mushroom that grows from corn).
Poisonous beans, refried and topped with “the secret adobo,” served with grilled tortillas. Oh, apparently poisonous and secret adobo means f’ing delicious in Spanish.
A Guadalajara special: drowned torta filled with carnitas. Though not very photogenic, it was tasty.
A Guadalajara special: drowned torta filled with carnitas. Though not very photogenic, it was tasty.
Some sort of chicken and veggies stacked between tortillas dish that a vegetarian ate and loved.
Some sort of chicken and veggies stacked between tortillas dish that a vegetarian ate and loved.

 

 

Categories
Asia Food + Drinks

My Bout of Extremely Explosive Thai Tummy

My stomach is a mysterious pit of reactionary behavior. It has no problem handling lethal amounts of Taco Bell. But it also has its sensitive side, leaving me ill for days after eating a bowl of [un]Lucky Charms that were recalled because of the green food dye. True story.

Before going to Thailand the only Thai food I’d ever had was a few bites of some rice and veggie dish years ago in Florida. So I played it safe when I got there, slowly indulging to avoid the sudden onset of Thai Tummy. I started with mostly Western breakfasts and lunches with foods I was already used to.

This plate just screams “I’m a 12 year old picky American who’s totally missing out on awesome food”
Sushi should be safe, right?

Then I finally graduated to proper, but light, Thai lunches including my personal favorite Tom Yum Soup (though I still avoided most of the shellfish).

Appetizers: Tom Yum Soup, some Thai fried egg omelette, and spring rolls

Then I had my first intimate encounter with a real Thai dish. Two days before leaving Phuket it was (still) down pouring and my snorkeling trip to the Phi Phi Islands had to be rescheduled for the next day. So I decided to treat myself to a fancy, slightly expensive dinner and try something I’d been drooling over since I arrived: Thai green curry with coconut milk and beef.

I’ve never had curry before, and despite my love of Mexican food I’m not really a fan of things that are too spicy. This dish was basically too spicy for my mouth to handle. But I was determined not to look like a wimpy tourist so I ate most of the meal like a champ. Then I cooled my burning tongue with two scoops of coconut and chocolate ice cream before taking a leisurely stroll back to the hotel to relax in the jacuzzi.

It all looked so good going in
It all looked so good going in
Even mixed with rice, still spicy as hell
I should’ve just stuck to this deliciously cold ice cream for dinner

I called it an early night in preparation for the last full day of my trip—boating, snorkeling, shopping, and going to a Muay Thai fight. It was the perfect rainy evening really. That was, until I shot awake at 3am feeling like I had been stabbed in the stomach by a ninja of the night.

The pain pierced my stomach to the beat of the pouring rain on the glass sliding doors. Then it hit me—I need to be on the toilet and I need to be on it now. Actually, I should’ve been in the bathroom like 10 seconds ago. And WHY ON EARTH were my shorts still on? I ran faster than I’ve ever ran in my life and luckily made it just in time. I hoped that was it. One bout of violent illness was enough to get whatever that was out of my system, right? So I made my way back towards the bed but siiiiike—the urge struck again before my second butt cheek even touched the mattress.

The second time I made it back to bed was a bit more successful and I tried my best to fall asleep in a pool of sweat. But sleep was impossible. Literally, every five minutes I’d get the immediate urge to projectile-empty the entire contents of my stomach out of whichever end provided a closer escape route. I was crying, confused, and absolutely disgusting. Suddenly the idea of taking a strong sleeping pill and sleeping naked in the tub seemed like the most reasonable solution.

Now, I’m a lady, I’m not supposed to talk about disgusting things like bowel movements—especially ones as abnormal as this—but holy shit. Literally. I finally understand the whole “I’m not sure what end it was going to come out of” saying, because several times I found myself looking to see if I could successfully move my rather thick American thighs far enough apart to vomit between them while on the toilet. WHY WAS THERE NOT A TRASH CAN IN THIS BATHROOM?

This went on for hours before I was finally able to get back to sleep. I woke up ill, had to cancel my snorkeling trip, and suddenly I was furious with Thailand. The front desk lady offered to bring me juice, but instead I asked if she could bring any sort of bread-like substance similar to toast. Does that even exist in Thailand? She sent a runner out and he came to my room with a croissant from Starbucks. But it smelled like Thailand. It didn’t taste like it, but it had that spicy curry smell that lingers in the thick humid air and as sick as I was, I just couldn’t really get past it. I just laid there sipping Sprite and water, hoping I could pull my shit together long enough to run out for some Imodium. I had come equipped with Pepto Bismol chewables but every time I put one of those in my mouth it induced pink vomit straight out of my nose. All I could think was “I have to get some water in me before I end up dehydrated and in the hospital” followed by “Oh fuck, I have to get on an airplane for a 30 hour flight tomorrow, how long does this shit last?”

Ordinarily I’d like to think I’m a pretty strong person, but let me tell you this: I am a needy, whiny, pathetic piece of vulnerable shit when I’m sick. I just want to lay in bed and throw myself a pity party, and I only want my mom to be within a 10 foot radius of me. And I will moan and whine in a “poor me” voice day and night. But my mom was 10,000 miles away, and 11 hours behind me in time. So I Skyped her. And finally after a half day curled up in the fetal position crying on video chat to Dr Mom, I was able to run downstairs to the pharmacy for some Imodium. It was a risky move I did with clenched butt cheeks, but you gotta do what you gotta do when you’re traveling alone.

I’d spent my entire full last day in bed, laughing (on the inside) at the mockery I was making of this gorgeous hotel room. It was a picture-perfect honeymoon suite: multi-room, glass enclosed shower and jacuzzi, huge bed, and a cozy balcony looking out at the Andaman Sea. And here I was, a lone girl soaked in sweat with various liquids and noises coming from multiple orifices. No wonder I’m single…

The pristine bathroom at its height of glory
At least I had a nice view to sob to
The immaculately clean tub I considered passing out in
Oh, did I mention that the sun came out for the first time while I was stuck in bed all day?
Seriously, could I have picked a nicer bathroom to get violently ill in?

I may have missed a day and a half of sunny island hopping and a Muay Thai fight, but the silver lining: I lost 7 pounds! And no, I still can’t even smell curry without wanting to vomit.Luckily the upset stomach had subsided (thanks to tons of medicine) before my flight, and I was able to get through all 30+ hours with only mild cramping and paranoia of grossing out an entire plane full of passengers.

Categories
Caribbean Food + Drinks

Getting High for Birthday Dinner in the BVI

I am by no means a food connoisseur. Hell, one of my favorite foods is the Cheesy Gordita Crunch from Taco Bell. But I do have nearly 27 years of experience in eating. That’s gotta give me some credibility, right?

Living in New York for nearly six years has given me a slight tendency to judge and compare food and dining experiences based on the best meals I’ve had in the city. But from my accumulation of previous feeding time adventures in the Caribbean, I wasn’t exactly sure what to expect when asking around for a nice restaurant to go to for birthday dinner. I’ve seen everything from folding chairs and paper plates, to fish covered with melted cheese. Several tourists and locals recommended the Bananakeet Cafe on top of Windy Hill, so we figured what the hell, why not? The name didn’t sound like much more than a simple grab-and-go spot for fruit and coffee, but we were told the view alone was worth it. With the tagline “The Higher You Get… The Better The View,” you can’t help but wonder what’s so great about this view. I can assure you, it did not disappoint my eyes or my tongue for my first dinner as a 26 year old.

Bananakeet Cafe, “The Higher You Get, The Better The View”

Described as “Caribbean fusion with a view,” the open-patio restaurant is situated alongside The Heritage Inn, with a tempting little pool between the two. The covered area near the bar opens up to a full seating area on the deck looking over the entire bay. And the infamous sunset. It could only be described as every cliche you would ever use to describe a perfect sunset, painting the sky with colors and dramatic clouds. The photos just couldn’t do it justice, but I kept snapping anyway. If you go to Banakeet Cafe, definitely plan on being there a bit before the sun goes down!

Sunset from Bananakeet Cafe
The view changes every minute, it’s hard not to snap a million pics in one sitting

Plus another great part about being there during sunset, you get a free sunset shot. But let’s just pretend they were free birthday shots because everyone in the world was obviously pumped about my birthday.

The evolution of Corona ads
Happy birthday dinner to me!

I was surprised to see a menu full of things that I couldn’t wait to put in my mouth. So I went with pumpkin soup, coconut fried shrimp, and sushi. Delicious, quality food, and an equally stellar presentation. Stephanie had the vegetarian pasta which she also said was incredible.

Pumpkin soup
Coconut fried shrimp
Sushi with what tasted like a peanut-based sesame soy sauce
Vegetarian Pasta

The food was delicious and fresh, and the service was great. Our waiter was friendly and kept offering to take pictures of us, and totally understood when I jumped up in the middle of ordering and told him to hold on while I snapped “the perfect sunset photo.” He even gave me a free birthday dessert! It certainly wasn’t a budget meal, but entirely worth every dollar.

And besides, it was my birthday so it was Stephanie’s treat! Thanks Stephanie!

Categories
Food + Drinks New York

How to Enjoy a Rainy NYC Day for Under $20

Temperatures could hit nearly 60 degrees this Friday in New York City, but winter isn’t quite over yet. All of those faux-spring days also bring plenty of grey skies and puddles galore. Whether you’re a tourist or a local, what better way is there to spend a rainy New York day than exploring one of the many world-famous museums? Since most of them have suggested admissions prices (which basically means you can pay whatever you want), it’s the perfect idea for anyone on a budget. Note to tourists: if you buy tickets for the American Museum of Natural History online, for example, you’ll pay the recommended general admission price of $16 plus a $4 fee (certain exhibits cost an additional fee). Just wait to buy tickets at the museum for a better deal. I paid $5 on a Saturday, and one of the girls I was with only paid a nickel; talk about a steal! Spend your money on a fabulous brunch instead. In fact, here’s a game plan for you to enjoy a perfect New York Saturday, rain or shine, in the Upper West Side for under $20.

If you’re looking for a cheap but classy and cozy brunch experience, Alice’s Tea Cup (Chapter 1) is the perfect fairytale prelude to a day at the museum. We were attracted by their extensive list of teas, but were pleasantly surprised at the quality of our meals.

Alice’s Tea Cup Chapter 1

Alice’s Tea Cup is a small restaurant and bakery with three locations in the Upper East and West Sides of Manhattan (chapters 1, 2, and 3, naturally). We visited Chapter 1 at 102 West 73rd Street since it’s only a few blocks from the American Museum of Natural History. Upon entering you’re deliciously teased with baked goods and specialty teas, and just a short walk to the back finds a few tables tucked away for dining.

The entryway lures you in with cookies, cakes, teas, and fairytale paraphernalia
The dining area and key-lock doors to the kitchen
Their great policy on cell phones

You might encounter a bit of a wait on the weekends so make sure to arrive early, leaving plenty of time for the museum afterwards. In the event that they tell you it could be an hour wait, just give them your phone number (they’ll call you!), and head around the corner for some window shopping on Columbus Ave. (In our experience a 60 minute wait playing dress-up in Betsey Johnson turned out to be more like 20, FYI). The tea isn’t more than a few bucks and the meals generally run between $8-$13, so you can enjoy a more healthy, gourmet meal than most places in that price range. Plus you get enough tea to last your entire meal, not just one tiny cup.

Poached eggs with smoked salmon and a rosemary hollandaise sauce
on top of buttermilk scones, with asparagus and pears
Croque Monsieur and mixed greens
Fresh berries for the yogurt and granola dish
Nutella and fresh blackberry crepes

I won’t give too much away about the AMNH in case you’re planning to see it for yourself. But before this trip, I’d never seen dinosaur bones in person (or if I did, I was far too young to remember). Needless to say I was ecstatic, pretty much like a 9 year old in a Baskin Robbins. Memories of my geeky grade school science books came pouring into my head as I rattled off random facts about the massive beings.We all enjoyed every last bit of our delicious meals and left feeling satisfied and fully energized to make our way through the museum.

Right when you enter the lobby, there are three overwhelmingly large dinosaurs just waiting to come to life and attack the hundreds of people below. We stopped dead in our tracks, jaws on the floor and cameras clicking away when we heard “you can’t stop here,” to which my friend Stephanie brilliantly snapped back “if you don’t want us stopping, don’t put awesome dinosaurs right there!”

A spectacular welcome to the American Museum of Natural History

The dinosaurs were amazing! I couldn’t help but think more than once that these “bones” looked more like petrified wood carved into silly shapes and sharp teeth. But it’s hard to believe that these things walked the same earth that us humans do.

Kimbosaurus creepin’
Pterodactyl skeletons are ridiculously creepy
Whoever said the Triceratops never existed?

Stegosaurus plates. Definitely one of my favorite dinosaurs as a child

I must forewarn you about one thing. I usually start museums on the top floor and work my way down to the bottom. The AMNH is huge. Not only that, but the dinosaurs are on the top floor. Once you see the dinosaurs—these massive, intriguing, extinct creatures—the other exhibits might not excite you all that much. Particularly the New York State Environment wing. We even passed the African wildlife area after seeing the dinosaurs and I just was not impressed. It’s almost  like, “Psh. I can see those elephants at the zoo any day. I’ll come back when they’re extinct.”

But there’s still plenty of intriguing exhibits at the AMNH. We took so long with the dinosaurs that we didn’t have much time to view too much more, but we did make it a point to take a glance at the meteorites, gems, ocean life, and of course, the giant Blue Whale.

A large iron meteorite that fell onto Earth with these pre-exisiting perfectly drilled holes
Gems and minerals
The ocean is an entire world in itself

You’ll be navigating your way through 25 interconnected buildings, so you’d better wear comfortable walking shoes. In theory, it sounds like an easygoing day, but as I left I heard one mom sum up the experience perfectly to her son: “I’m exhausted. I’m exhausted to my core. We’re going home.”

If you’re craving some dinosaur action and can’t make it to the AMNH any time soon, check out some more photographs on Flickr. And if you are planning a trip, be sure to download one of the the AMNH apps for your iPhone, iPod Touch, or iPad.

Categories
Food + Drinks New York

The Stanton Social: Tapas, NYC Style

If you’re looking for a unique dining experience in New York City, you’ll want to head down to the Lower East Side. The Stanton Social is a tapas-style restaurant serving up food that is intended to be shared amongst a group—hence the word “social.”  With a full raw bar and 40 additional items to choose from, you’ll probably have a hard time narrowing your selections down to just a few. I’m not usually one to share food, but ordering 13 different dishes certainly made me feel more generous.

The Stanton Social is a fantastic (though slightly expensive) way to try new foods of several different ethnicities. It’s hidden on the South side of Stanton (we walked past it twice), but the reward is well worth the search. The decor is very sleek for the Lower East Side—a bit of 1940s swank with intimate leather booths tucked along the walls, and a row of tables down the middle on the first floor. The far wall glows with a gigantic display boasting over 2,000 bottles of wine.

After being seated we started off with a complimentary Pumpkin Puree and Ricotta Crostini, which was a surprisingly tasty blend of two of my favorite flavors—pumpkin and cheese—served on a crispy round of bread. Being the frugal gal that I am, the idea of a “free” dish was so exciting I scarfed it down without taking a photo. For the other foods you’ll have to excuse the blurry photos. I was going to a concert after dinner so the only camera I had on me was my iPhone. Plus, it’s one thing to photograph your own food before eating, but telling three others to “hold on” while trying to get the perfect shot doesn’t always go over so well.

Shortly after placing our orders the plates began to come one by one. The continuous flow kept the meal moving, giving us little time to wonder what was coming next. We always had 1-3 dishes in front of us, but they were replaced just as quickly as we finished to keep the flow going.

Maryland Jumbo Lump Crabcake “Corn Dogs” $13

I’m not a huge fan of seafood, but these were probably the best of the seafood dishes that we ordered. The crab cake was 10x better than those I’ve had at the Fisherman’s Wharf in San Francisco.

French Onion Soup Dumplings $12

If you’re a fan of the Food Network you’ve probably seen these on “The Best Thing I Ever Ate.” These bite-sized dumplings are served in an escargot dish, melted with a layer of Gruyère cheese, and skewered with croutons. These weren’t as brothy as I thought they would be, but the flavors were all there. Plus I’m a sucker for anything with Gruyère on it.

Potato & Goat Cheese Pierogies w/ caramelized onions & truffle crème fraîche $9

This soft blend of creamy flavor worked perfectly together with just a dab of the dipping sauce (and I’m usually a scooper, not a dipper).

 

Barbecue Duck Confit & Black Bean Empanadas w/ smoked tomato & blood orange jam $10

I was a little nervous about the blood orange jam as a sauce, but the flavors mixed incredibly well, and really moistened the black bean filling to a more enjoyable taste and texture.

Sweet & Sour Chicken & Cashew Spring Rolls $9

I didn’t care for the spring rolls, probably because I don’t have the taste buds for anything sweet & sour. Everyone else enjoyed them, so they must’ve been good.

Warm Piquillo Pepper ‘Bruschetta’ stuffed with roasted garlic-goat cheese $7

These. Were. Amazing. The red pepper was somehow prepared into a strangely smooth, soft, and flexible texture that felt weird to touch but tasted great. The flavors in the garlic goat cheese stuffing paired perfectly with the pepper and the crispy bread.

Sliders: ‘Kobe Philly’ w/ truffle & goat cheese fondue $9; Kobe Beef Burger $7; Rhode Island Style Lobster Roll $9

I ordered the Kobe Philly and enjoyed a different take on the Philadelphia Cheesesteak. I’ve only had one Philly Cheesesteak in my life so I don’t have much to compare it to, but the quality of this miniature sandwich FAR surpassed the one I had in a Midtown deli. That truffle and melted goat cheese concoction should be used on every dish that I order from now on. Everywhere.

Social Mac & Cheese with chorizo & oven dried tomato $12

I licked the dish clean with this macaroni and cheese. It was a perfect mixture of gooey cheese and crunchy, toasted bread crumbs. The little bits of tomatoes added a new, juicy taste to this gourmet macaroni and cheese.

Creekstone Farms Natural Hanger Steak w/ tomato chorizo sauce, truffle salt, & crispy tater tots $21

Ohhh the hanger steak. Had I not been so full, I would’ve wanted this to be an 8 ouncer. Both the red and the green sauces rocked my world.

Butter poached Lobster Pizzetta w/ caramelized shallots, smoked bacon & truffle mascarpone $18

Again, not a huge fan of seafood, so the lobster pizzetta was probably my least favorite. I tried one piece but the medley of flavors was almost too much for me.

Red Velvet Twinkie w/ cream cheese & crème fraîche filling, $4 each

The red velvet twinkies were satisfying and moist, but nowhere comparable to some of the best red velvet cakes in New York City.

Apple Pie Sundae w/ caramel-cinnamon ice cream, pie crust nuggets, caramel apples & whipped cream $10

Do NOT buy this dessert unless you definitely intend on sharing. It’s huge! I thought it would have been better with vanilla ice cream (but then again I don’t like caramel), but otherwise it was an interesting change to apple pie à la mode.

Chai Crème Brulée with spiced ‘misfortune’ cookies $9

This was phenomenal. The “misfortunes” inside of the cookies were slightly depressing, but one bite of the perfectly cooked custard certainly made my night.

If you’re planning to visit The Stanton Social, I definitely recommend making a reservation. Arrive hungry and preferably with someone else’s credit card. Depending on how many people in your party, most of these things are literally priced per bite. My guess is you’ll be so overwhelmed with choices you’ll start spending ferociously like we did. For four people they say 7-8 dishes are usually enough. But 13 selections and $215 worth of food later, we all left happy.

The Stanton Social
99 Stanton Street between Orchard & Ludlow
Lower East Side, NY 10002
Brunch 1130a-3p
Dinner Sun-Weds 5p-2a; Thurs-Sun 5p-3a